Monday, March 8, 2010

NEWSFLASH: Sean Hayes Admit's He's Gay

Big Fucking Deal.

Look, I'm sorry for the profanity and I'm conflicted about my reaction, but please.
I LOVE Sean Hayes, and I LOVED his work on Will & Grace as Jack McFarland. I think he's a brilliant commediene and has talent very rare in the business of show business.
During the eight years he was on Will & Grace, and the ensuing 4 years since the shows end, he has never been 'out' publicly.

If you read the Advocate interview (which you can do by clicking on the photo), he will argue he "never lied about who or what he is", "never hid the fact he is a gay man" and even "made a huge contribution to furthering gay rights". Well, maybe the last one could be true, as his portrayal of Jack McFarland was so likeable and entertaining he had to have reached some "unfriendlies" out there. However, as for the rest?


I'm not saying he didn't have his reasons for all the non-answers and coy replies he gave when asked about his sexuality....but nevertheless.....he lied.   Sure, we all knew, and many didn't care which is fine. But my beef is this: When you are a successful gay, someone who achieves power and influence (and let's face it, he did) and you refuse at the very LEAST to be open? You're sending the message that being gay is something to hide, to be ashamed of. And what message is that sending to kids coming of age during a time like the Bush administration when we were villified to the extreme?

Oh yeah, I know the arguments. "Who's business is anyone's sexuality anyway?" "Why does it matter?" Let me just say...those are insipid rationaliztions for people who are ashamed or want to make their money of the backs of those who live their lives openly and honestly and with dignity.  Period.

So Seah Hayes is proclaiming he's gay huh? Well, welcome to the party Sean! I'm still a fan of your work, still in love with you as an actor but when it comes to your character? You don't get any props from me for the last 12 years. Let's see what the next 12 bring.


Sean said...

Whenever I read someone's condemnation of another person choosing their time and place to come out, I want to know when they came out at work?

As great as I think it would be for everyone to be able to come out, I only judge when they lie or their actions harm our community. (beyond not coming out)

Did you or would you have written the same post about NPH? Meredith Baxter? What will you say when Anderson and Jake come out?

In my last two jobs, I was not comfortable coming out - and I was in Retail in DC.

Sean said...

ps. to my first comment. The LGBT has enough attackers that we don't need to be attacking each other and I've just seen too much of that lately.

A Lewis said...

I agree! He repeatedly said "I will not discuss my sexual orientation." It was a shame then and it's a shame now. Stand up and be counted, for god's sake.

Wonder Man said...

This is very interesting to say the least

Michael Rivers said...

I had the exact same reaction as you did.

WannabeVirginia W. said...

Oh hey, I loved Sean Hayes also. I believe individuals have their reasons on when they should come out. (self identify) and it ought to be their choice when and to whom. I am respectfully saying that he may have had reasons why he did not self identify a being gay then then as oppose to now. Jus sayin :)

Geoff said...

I had no real inkling anyone would even care about this post, and it looks like I struck a nerve.

I did say I'm sure he had his reasons, and I DO believe every person has their time and place to come out (btw yes I did write about Meridith....and NPH on my old blog although I wasn't as upset as with Sean Hayes)
I hope my opinion didn't poison anyones feelings.

I said at the beginning I was conflicted because I always had a love for Mr Hayes, and still do. I just believe during that time and place, people who made their money off the backs of the gay community...and who are in fact gay owe it to be honest.

Being gay is nothing to be ashamed of and that's the exact message people send when they give non answers.

During Bushs' reign of terror, we needed out and proud figures/role models/leaders. I would say also that Sean Hayes was NOT in the process of coming out and learning who he was. He was an adult gay man who put one foot back in the closet for his career, took the money (which was built on the gay love for the show) and then flipped off every GLBT (figuratively) with his lies/non answers/and ambiguity. He did this to you and me, but moreso to the pioneer gays who endured real hate, discrimination and bodily injury for being courageous enough to be honest and open about who they were.

I am still a huge fan of Sean Hayes, I just expected more from him.

Thankyou for reading my ramble and post. I respect each and every one of you.

Brooke Santor said...

A FUCKIN MEN! Preach it Geoff!

Charlie said...

I thought his whole tone in the advocate piece was just awful. But about the gays sniping at each other comment, I don't think you were snippy geoff. I think your point was right on. He wasnt coming out, he was going back in the closet to collect his cash. He was very hypocritecal. Just my feelings on the matter.

Kevin said...

He may have been told horror stories by agents and publicists about what happens when actors come out.

Twelve years ago, it was just Ellen--and maybe a few stragglers.

However, I also agree that he should have come out sooner. I understand Sean's comment about coming out at work, but it's Hollywood. And he's one of the stars of a big, gay show. And the gay community tuned in by the millions.

I don't know--the day I came out at work was the same day I came out period. But then, I'm not famous.

I think being on the cover of a magazine and coming out is great--but not 12 years after you shot to fame. Besides, after the first year, we already knew anyway.

steven corry said...

Good for Sean!

Not your business!

Since I am the oldest and wisest amongst you. If a person makes it to his dream of being an actor/comedian millionaire, why should he chance blowing it all to appease a bunch of gays.

Once a person comes out like,
Neil Patric Harris, which is alright because he is a broadway talented singer, actor and dancer, for me and my roommate when we flip by "How I met your Mother," there is no way in hell that we can buy that he is a ladies man, and hense find it offensive to see yet another gay man pursuing a woman. For me, he came out in his amazing role in RENT, and therefore I never could watch, "How I met your mother."

Don't get me started on that Ann Heche. When I see her be sexual with a man on TV, I have to run to the guest bathroom and barf.

No, once an actor comes out, he can no longer play a heterosexual, because every viewer knows it just a queer pretending. Personal transparency has been the end of many a career.

A straight man can play gay and go on, but a gay actor or actress is finished, unless they have other talents, or are willing to work on low budget trash. Period, which means it is true.

My favorite movies as a kid were Rock Hudson and Doris Day movies. Though I am 100% gay, I am happy I didn't know my Rock Hudson, who I lusted after, was gay. Kind of blows the concept of a Romantic Comedy.

You know I am right. I am always right!

steven corry said...

One more thing, and I don't mind sounding pissed, but if a person watched Sean Hayes, and didn't know he was gay, that person has NO gay radar. I am sorry.

Oh, and forget it coming out if you want to get paid for endorsing something. Look at the golfer and he fucked woman, which in this culture should get him points, particularly in the liquor industry. the golfer's career is temporary through.
Sean now officially is finished as an actor unless he wants low budget. Before Will and Grace, Sean did some commercials. That now is no longer a possibility.

Now I am getting worked up. We are more then gay. Being gay is about sucking and fucking, not a person's career, unless he or she is whore.

I came out working at the United States Post Office, and no one gave a shit because I was no one. So there you go.

Geoff said...

LOL....sorry Steven but we will not see eye to eye on this.

My beef with Hayes was the fact he used us, made his cash on us and basicly disowned us publicly....then sounded all pissy about it. (and you know I'm right).

PS: I'm still a fan even if you are pissed!

kris gilman said...

"Oldest" never equals "wisest". I am sorry it looks like so many ppl are angry but from my pov geoff is spot the fuck on! Way to call it like it is geoff, we love ya!

Kevin said...

"We are more then gay. Being gay is about sucking and fucking, not a person's career, unless he or she is whore."

If that's all what being gay is, then there shouldn't be any problems with watching straight/gay play gay/straight.

Personally, I think your "wise" comments are offensive and slightly archaic. I don't think you're giving either community enough credit.

Blake said...

I dont get it. Why is everyone angry? It seems to me it is just a matter of common sence that we should all be out because hiding or denying or lieing is what a coward does. How many politicians have hurt us with their laws but now we find out are really gay??? I know a ton of gays at school and no one is on the dl. I like who I am as a glbtq and I think it all comes down to self love and accepting you are a work of art, perfect in every way. And being gay is not just about fucking and sucking. its something much more fabulous and holy I think than just sex acts.

Kyle said...

The Truth= Freedom & Respect

The Closet=A Soul's Slow Death

The End

Everyone has to make their own choices in life and everyone is judged by them, that doesn't make your points any less valid Geoff.

Tom said...

Geoff, gawd I wish I could post something like this.... You rock for just presenting the facts...

As for me, my "gaydar" went off the first time I saw the show... Yet I didn't get a cover shot on the Advocate when I came out to my wife and 4 kids....

Guess that says something about all of us Once Closeted folks...

Please call the Advocate and tell them I am available next week for my photo shoot!!

Love ya dude!


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